Sometimes I struggle.

Sometimes I struggle....
It's hard to understand God's master plan. 
It's all perfect the yoga teacher says.
Today the perfection is hidden behind the struggles
like the sun hidden behind the clouds. 

Sometimes I struggle....
The shadow emotions hit me like a tidal wave. 
The wind gets knocked out of me. 
Dear God... I'm trying to have faith.
I try to remember your Grace that flows so abundantly some days.
Today is just one moment. 
Tomorrow another. 

Sometimes I struggle....
I am not the general contractor of the universe
that position is already filled.
Arrogance is behind my desire for life to be different than what it is.
After all how can I presume to know better than God how things should be. 

Sometimes I struggle....
I want to fight against the injustice and injury. 
I want to cry at the sadness. 
My tears wash away the ego that clouds my inner vision.
It's all in God's hands.  

Sometimes I struggle...
Then I remember the power behind it all.
"Know him to be enshrined in your heart always.
Truly there is nothing more in life to know.
Meditate and realize this world
is filled with the presence of God." 
(Shvetashvatara Upanishad) 


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