Wednesday, October 28, 2015

The journey

I'm on the train for the long journey home
Sometimes its quiet 
Sometimes there's a lot of distractions
I need to learn to find comfort
for the long journey home

I watch the scenery out the window
Sometimes it's so beautiful it takes my breath away
Sometimes it's dark and scary
I need to learn to find comfort
for the long journey home 

Passengers board and passengers leave
Sometimes the seat next to me is taken by kindness
Sometimes it's harshness
I need to learn to find comfort
for the long journey home

When the scenery is dark and scary 
When the next seat is filled with anger 
I want to leave the train
"this isn't the right train" I tell myself

But this is the train home 
My heart longs to be home 
so 
I need to learn to find comfort

After all,  the scenery and the passengers
come and go
I am just a traveler on the long journey home 

 

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Don't believe everything you think.

When you discover someone lied to you, you feel betrayed and hurt.  You begin to question everything that person ever said to you.  Suddenly the memories flood back into your mind.
There were clues.  There were times when your gut was telling you something was off but you
didn't want to see the truth.. You believed what you were told rather than what you knew to
be the truth.   What you heard was a better story than what you felt.   Why do we accept what
we are told so easily?  Why are we so afraid to question what people offer as the truth?

When we learn the practice of meditation we begin by sitting with our eyes closed watching ourselves breath.   Once we're comfortable watching the breath we step back even further and watch our thoughts.  This practice of watching is often referred to as stepping into our "witness consciousness"   It is suggested that from this place of the witness we engage the buddhi, which is the state from which we can be more discerning and where we can "see" the truth.

My personal experience is that sometimes I don't want to "see" the truth.   The story my senses are telling me is so much more appealing than what I know to be true.  Once you know the truth there's no way to not know it.  When you discover how the magic trick works the fun of the illusion is gone.
Or is it?

It's not a secret that I hold myself and everyone else to a very high standard.  My moral compass is set very high and seems to be glued in place.  Contrary to popular belief, I still don't think that's a bad thing.  I like order and structure so rules are important.   It's good to know the difference between right and wrong.   Interestingly though, I've begun to question what I believe to be right and wrong.

When my mind is clear from the senseless chatter,  I step into that state of the witness.   I have to admit that I'm pretty shocked at some of the thoughts that I witness.  Even more shocking is how strongly I BELIEVE the thoughts to be true.  Without question, I believe everything my mind thinks!  Is everyone this naive?  Do you believe everything your mind tells you?

Imagine how shocked and betrayed I felt when I realize that my mind has been lying to me!!  Very clearly,  I saw that some of my firmly held beliefs were A BIG FAT LIE!  So I begin to question.  The hurt and betrayal are temporary... Those feelings are being replaced with a sense of freedom and curiosity.

It all comes back to the practice of yoga/meditation.  When you are firmly established in your practice and can be in that witness state you can begin to see those long held "beliefs".  Are they true? Are they helpful? Are they kind?   Then you can CHOOSE which beliefs to hold on to and which no longer serve you.

Important yoga lesson of the day.... You don't have to believe everything you think.  It's good to question your beliefs.  Just because everyone believes it to be true doesn't make it true.  Test the theory.  Feel the story. How does it feels?  The truth will set you free.  Do your beliefs free you or enslave you?  

What would you say to your 19-year-old self?

  When I was 19 years old I didn't know a damn thing about life.  I certainly didn't know a damn thing about myself (I just didn'...