SD was reading my mind again tonight. At least that's what it seemed like. I wonder how long you have to be a yogi before you can read minds. Remember that movie with Mel Gibson? The one where he could read women's minds. Would you like to be able to glimpse into someone's thoughts? I would imagine that we'd be surprised to know that what goes on in other people's minds is not that different than what's going on in our own minds.
So I wasn't going to go to class tonight. Believe it or not I actually considered not going. I've been so cranky lately and just didn't want to go. I did go to class however, (I'm such a creature of habit) and I'm glad that I did. I chatted with another student about a book we're reading as I walked in. I'm greeted with a hug from SD. As I sat chatting with a couple of really lovely women before class I feel my mood start to shift. The bhavana (intention/theme) for the class was letting go of the negative self-talk. Changing those negative
beliefs we have about ourselves. The negative belief I struggle with the most is "I'm not good enough". It's the one that's been playing in my mind almost constantly lately.
As we moved through the practice, I was uncomfortable in my body. I was feeling pain in my lower back and my shoulders. I was unable to do the poses as deeply as I usually do. I love pigeon pose but tonight it felt like torture on my hips and lower back. Just as the negative self-talk begins in my mind I hear SD say, breath in love....... The hardest thing to do for some of us is to love ourselves and to recognize our own Divinity. Why is that so difficult?
I was sweating..... I hate sweating.... but tonight it felt good to sweat. My mood was definitely shifting. Even though physically I was feeling tight I felt a sense of release during the practice. Like the crankiness and negativity I've been feeling was being physically released from my pores. (I know that's gross - but that's what it felt like).
I don't think it's so much that SD is a mind reader but that he's just recognizing that all our struggles are the same. My worries are the same as your worries. My struggles are the same as your struggles. When we acknowledge that, then our sense of separateness begins to fade and we recognize the Divinity in each other.
The word Namaste means the Divine in me recognizes and honors the Divine in you.